Beyond the Title: What Does Success *Really* Mean?
Welcome back to the blog, listeners! In our latest podcast episode, we had the incredible opportunity to sit down with the insightful Laura Berman Fortgang, a true pioneer in the world of coaching and personal development. We delved deep into the concept of success, and let me tell you, it was a conversation that shifted my perspective entirely. In this post, we'll expand on that episode, dissecting Laura's powerful definition of success and exploring how we can all move beyond the often-constricting traditional metrics to find a more personal, fulfilling, and ultimately, more authentic path to achievement. If you haven't had a chance to listen to the full episode, you can find it right here. Prepare to have your ideas about what it means to "win" at life challenged and redefined!
Who is Laura Berman Fortgang and Why Her Perspective Matters
Before we dive into the nitty-gritty of redefining success, it’s crucial to understand who Laura Berman Fortgang is and why her voice carries so much weight in this conversation. Laura isn't just a coach; she's a trailblazer. As one of the earliest professionally trained coaches in the United States and a founding member of the International Coach Federation, she’s been at the forefront of this transformative field for decades. Her experience spans coaching individuals from all walks of life, including executives within global organizations and Fortune 500 companies. She's the best-selling author of "Now What? 90 Days to a New Life Direction" and has penned several other influential books focusing on finding meaning and professional growth. Her work has touched millions through extensive media appearances, impactful speaking engagements, and a widely viewed TEDx talk. This extensive background gives her a unique vantage point, built on real-world application and a deep understanding of human aspiration and fulfillment.
What makes Laura’s perspective particularly vital is her consistent emphasis on authenticity and purpose. In a world that often shouts about external markers of achievement, she consistently guides us back to the internal compass. She’s seen firsthand how chasing external validation can lead to burnout and dissatisfaction, even for those who appear to have it all. Her approach isn't about tearing down ambition; it's about redirecting it towards what truly nourishes the soul and fosters genuine contentment. This is why her insights are so crucial in today's fast-paced, often superficial landscape. She provides a roadmap for navigating these complexities and discovering a definition of success that is not only sustainable but deeply rewarding.
The Problem with Traditional Success Metrics (Titles, Salary, etc.)
Let's be honest. We've all been conditioned to think about success in a very specific, often narrow, way. Think about it: how do we typically answer the question, "How are you doing?" or "What are you up to?" More often than not, our answers revolve around our job titles, our salaries, the size of our house, or the car we drive. These are the societal benchmarks that have been hammered into us from childhood. We see them on social media, in movies, and even in casual conversations. Promotions, corner offices, six-figure salaries – these have become the universal indicators of a "successful" life.
While there's nothing inherently wrong with achieving these things, the problem arises when they become the *sole* definition of success. When these external metrics become the ultimate goal, we risk losing sight of what truly matters. We can find ourselves climbing a ladder that leads to nowhere we actually want to be, driven by external validation rather than internal satisfaction. This can lead to a pervasive sense of emptiness, even when all the "boxes" of traditional success are ticked. Imagine landing that dream job with a hefty salary, only to realize you dread going to work every day. Or achieving a coveted title and feeling utterly unfulfilled by the responsibilities. This is the paradox of traditional success metrics – they can be hollow victories.
Furthermore, these traditional metrics are often inherently comparative. We're constantly measuring ourselves against others. Is their salary higher? Is their title more impressive? This creates a perpetual state of competition and dissatisfaction. It fosters a mindset of scarcity, where there isn't enough success to go around, and we constantly need to strive to get ahead of someone else. This competitive drive, when unchecked, can erode our well-being and our ability to find joy in our own journey. We become so fixated on the destination that we forget to enjoy the ride, or worse, realize the destination isn't what we truly desired.
Laura's Core Philosophy: Success as Personal Fulfillment and Alignment
This is where Laura Berman Fortgang's revolutionary perspective shines. Her core philosophy offers a powerful antidote to the pitfalls of traditional success metrics. Laura defines success not by what the world tells us it should be, but by what it feels like to *us*. At its heart, her definition is rooted in two fundamental pillars: **personal fulfillment** and **alignment**.
Personal fulfillment is about experiencing a deep sense of satisfaction, joy, and meaning in our lives and work. It’s about feeling a sense of purpose and contribution, regardless of the external accolades. It’s the quiet confidence that comes from knowing you are living in accordance with your values and your true self. Fulfillment isn't about constantly seeking external validation; it's about cultivating an internal wellspring of contentment.
Alignment is about ensuring that your actions, your choices, and your life’s direction are in harmony with your deepest values, your passions, and your innate strengths. When you are aligned, you feel a sense of flow and ease. Your work doesn't feel like a chore; it feels like an extension of who you are. Your decisions feel right, even when they are challenging. Alignment is about living congruently, where your outer life reflects your inner truth.
Laura argues that true success is found at the intersection of these two elements. It’s not about having the biggest house, but about living in a space that brings you peace. It’s not about the highest salary, but about earning enough to live comfortably and pursue what truly matters to you. It’s about finding work that ignites your spirit, challenges you in meaningful ways, and allows you to contribute your unique talents to the world. This shift in perspective moves us from a place of striving to a place of thriving, from a place of external pressure to a place of internal resonance.
How Our Definition of Success Evolves Throughout Life and Career
One of the most liberating aspects of Laura’s philosophy is the understanding that our definition of success is not static. It’s a living, breathing entity that evolves as we do. What might have defined success for us in our twenties – perhaps ambition, rapid career progression, and financial independence – might look entirely different in our forties or sixties. Life experiences, changing priorities, personal growth, and the wisdom gained over time all contribute to this evolution.
Consider a young professional just starting their career. Their definition of success might be heavily influenced by climbing the corporate ladder, gaining recognition, and proving their worth in a competitive environment. They might prioritize long hours and intense dedication to build a strong foundation. As they move into their thirties and forties, they might start to re-evaluate. Perhaps family becomes a more significant priority, or they begin to crave more work-life balance. They might start to question the relentless pursuit of external validation and seek work that offers more meaning and flexibility. Their definition of success might shift to include things like being a present parent, having time for hobbies, or engaging in work that has a tangible positive impact.
Later in life, as we approach retirement or enter a new phase, our priorities may shift again. We might find success in mentoring others, contributing to our communities, or pursuing long-held passions that were put on the back burner during our more demanding career years. The drive for accumulation might wane, replaced by a desire for contribution, legacy, and peace. Laura emphasizes that this evolution is not a sign of regression or failure; it’s a natural and beautiful part of personal growth. Embracing this fluidity allows us to remain aligned with ourselves at every stage, ensuring that our pursuit of success remains relevant and deeply satisfying.
Practical Steps to Discovering Your Own Meaningful Definition of Success
So, how do we move from understanding this concept to actively cultivating our own personalized definition of success? Laura offers practical, actionable steps that anyone can implement. It’s a process of introspection and intentional living.
1. Conduct a Success Audit: Where Are You Now?
The first step is to honestly assess your current definition of success. What metrics are you currently using? What are your internal and external drivers? Take time to journal about what "success" looks like for you *today*. Be brutally honest. Are you chasing external validation, or are you genuinely feeling fulfilled? Identify the areas where you feel a strong sense of purpose and alignment, and those where you feel a disconnect.
2. Uncover Your Core Values: What Truly Matters?
Your values are the bedrock of your personal definition of success. What principles guide your decisions? What do you stand for? Think about moments when you felt most proud, most alive, most yourself. What values were you honoring in those moments? Common values include integrity, creativity, connection, growth, generosity, freedom, and contribution. Make a list of your top 3-5 core values. These will serve as your compass.
3. Identify Your Passions and Strengths: What Ignites You?
What activities make you lose track of time? What subjects do you love to learn about? What are you naturally good at? Your passions and strengths are indicators of where you can find fulfillment. Often, our most profound contributions come from the intersection of what we love to do and what we are good at. Don't dismiss seemingly small interests or talents. They can be the building blocks of a deeply meaningful life.
4. Envision Your Ideal State: What Does "Enough" Look Like?
Instead of focusing on "more," focus on "enough." What would truly satisfy you? What level of financial security, work engagement, and personal time would allow you to feel successful and at peace? This isn't about settling; it's about defining your own sense of abundance. Visualize your life when you are living your definition of success. What does a typical day look like? How do you feel?
5. Set Intentions, Not Just Goals: Align Your Actions
Once you have a clearer picture, set intentions that align with your values, passions, and envisioned ideal state. Instead of just setting a goal like "get promoted," set an intention like "seek out opportunities that leverage my creative problem-solving skills and offer opportunities for mentorship." Intentions guide your actions and help you stay aligned even when external circumstances change.
Applying This to Your Career: Finding Purpose Beyond the Paycheck
The workplace is often where we spend a significant portion of our lives, making it a prime area for applying this redefined concept of success. For many, the career path is deeply intertwined with their sense of self-worth. Shifting the focus beyond the paycheck and job title can be liberating and lead to greater professional satisfaction and longevity.
Consider your current role. Are you simply going through the motions, or are you engaged? Are there aspects of your work that align with your values and strengths? If not, how can you subtly shift your focus? This might involve volunteering for projects that utilize your passions, seeking out mentors who embody the kind of professional success you admire, or even exploring internal role changes that offer a better fit.
If your current career path feels entirely misaligned, it might be time to consider a larger pivot. This doesn't necessarily mean drastic, overnight changes. It can be a gradual process of exploration. Perhaps you can start a side hustle that aligns with your passions, take courses to develop new skills, or network with people in fields that genuinely excite you. The key is to move incrementally towards work that offers purpose, challenge, and fulfillment, not just a steady income.
Remember, finding purpose beyond the paycheck is an ongoing journey. It requires continuous self-reflection and a willingness to adapt. As your life and career evolve, so too will your definition of what constitutes a successful and fulfilling professional life. Embrace this evolution, and you’ll discover a deeper wellspring of motivation and satisfaction in your work.
Conclusion: Embracing a More Authentic Path to Achievement
As we wrap up this exploration, I hope you’re feeling inspired to re-examine your own definition of success. The conversation with Laura Berman Fortgang on the podcast was a powerful reminder that the traditional metrics we’ve been fed are often incomplete and can even be detrimental to our well-being. True success, as Laura so eloquently articulates, is about living a life that is rich in personal fulfillment and deeply aligned with our core values and passions.
Moving beyond the confines of job titles and salary figures allows us to unlock a more authentic and sustainable path to achievement. It’s about finding joy in the process, contributing meaningfully, and experiencing a deep sense of contentment with who we are and what we do. Remember, this is not a one-time fix, but an ongoing journey of self-discovery and intentional living. Embrace the evolution of your definition of success, and you’ll undoubtedly find a more rewarding and meaningful way to navigate your life and career.
Thank you for joining me on the blog and in spirit with our latest episode. If you’re looking to dive deeper into this topic, I highly encourage you to revisit our conversation with Laura. You can access the full episode and show notes here. And as always, we love hearing from you. Feel free to share your thoughts and insights with us – you can even send us a text. Until next time, keep redefining success on your own terms!